How to Protect Your Elderly Parent From Phone and Online Scams
Your parent has lived through recessions, raised a family, and navigated decades of life with wisdom and common sense. But none of that protects them from a scammer who knows exactly how to exploit trust, loneliness, and confusion.
Elder fraud costs Americans over $28 billion a year. The FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center reported that adults over 60 lost $4.8 billion to scams in 2024 alone — a 43% increase from the previous year. And those are just the cases that get reported. The actual number is almost certainly higher, because many seniors are too embarrassed to tell anyone they’ve been scammed.
If your parent lives alone, they’re especially vulnerable. Here’s what you need to know.
The Most Common Scams Targeting Seniors
The Grandparent Scam
A caller pretends to be a grandchild in trouble — “Grandma, I’ve been arrested, I need bail money, please don’t tell Mom and Dad.” The urgency and secrecy are designed to bypass rational thinking. With Ai voice cloning, these calls can now sound exactly like a real family member.
Tech Support Scams
A pop-up appears on their computer: “Your computer has been infected! Call this number immediately.” The “tech support” agent then asks for remote access to their computer and either installs malware, steals banking information, or charges hundreds of dollars for “repairs” that were never needed.
Medicare and Insurance Scams
Callers pose as Medicare representatives and ask for personal information, Social Security numbers, or banking details to “verify” coverage or process a “refund.” Medicare will never call unsolicited and ask for this information.
Romance Scams
A lonely senior meets someone online who showers them with attention and affection. Over weeks or months, the scammer builds trust before asking for money — usually for an “emergency,” “medical bills,” or “travel to come visit.” The average romance scam victim loses over $14,000.
Lottery and Prize Scams
“Congratulations, you’ve won $500,000! Just pay the processing fee of $500 to claim your prize.” No legitimate lottery or contest requires upfront payment. Ever.
Home Repair Scams
A person shows up at the door offering to fix the roof, repave the driveway, or trim trees — at a steep discount if they pay cash right now. The work is either never completed, done poorly, or was never needed in the first place.
Warning Signs Your Parent May Have Been Targeted
- Unusual withdrawals — large cash withdrawals, wire transfers, or gift card purchases
- New “friends” — someone they’ve never met in person who they talk about frequently
- Secrecy — being evasive about phone calls, visitors, or financial transactions
- Anxiety or fear — seeming stressed after phone calls or computer use
- Gift cards — no legitimate organization asks for payment in gift cards. This is the #1 red flag.
- New software on their computer — remote access tools they didn’t install themselves
- Unpaid bills despite having money — funds may have been diverted
How to Protect Your Parent
Have the conversation early
Don’t wait until after they’ve been scammed. Talk about common scams in a way that doesn’t feel condescending. Share news stories about scams — “Did you see this story about people getting calls pretending to be grandchildren?” — so it feels like a conversation, not a lecture.
Set up a family code word
Agree on a secret word that only family members know. If someone calls claiming to be a grandchild or family member in distress, your parent can ask for the code word. No code word, hang up.
Enable call screening
Most phone carriers offer free call screening that filters robocalls and unknown numbers. On iPhones, enable “Silence Unknown Callers.” On Android, use the built-in call screening feature. This alone can block the majority of scam calls.
Monitor financial accounts
With your parent’s permission, set up alerts on their bank accounts for transactions over a certain amount. Many banks also offer “trusted contact” programs where a family member is notified of unusual activity.
Limit pop-up exposure
Install an ad blocker on their browser. Set their browser homepage to something safe. Make sure their operating system and browser are up to date. These simple steps prevent most tech support scam pop-ups from ever appearing.
Register on the Do Not Call list
Register their phone number at donotcall.gov. It won’t stop all scam calls, but it reduces legitimate telemarketing calls, making suspicious calls easier to identify.
Use an Ai companion with scam protection
This is a newer approach, but it’s worth considering. If your parent has a daily Ai companion they talk to, that companion can serve as a first line of defense.
Grace, the senior companion from HiFriendbot, has scam protection built into her personality. If your parent mentions that someone is asking them for money, personal information, or gift cards, Grace immediately flags it:
- She warns them that it sounds like it could be a scam
- She encourages them to talk to a family member before doing anything
- She never gives financial advice herself
- She remembers the conversation, so it shows up in context if the topic comes up again
This doesn’t replace your own vigilance, but it adds a layer of protection during the hours you can’t be there. Grace is patient enough that your parent might mention something to her that they wouldn’t mention to you — either because they don’t want to worry you, or because they’re not sure if it’s a real threat.
Grace is $29.99/month as part of HiFriendbot’s Senior Care plan. Along with scam protection, she provides persistent memory, medication reminders, daily digest emails, and gentle mental exercises.
What to Do If Your Parent Has Been Scammed
Don’t blame them
This is the most important thing. Scammers are professionals. They target millions of people and they’re very, very good at what they do. Your parent is not stupid — they were targeted by someone whose full-time job is manipulation. Shame will only make them hide it next time.
Act quickly on finances
- Contact their bank immediately to freeze accounts or reverse transactions
- If they paid by gift card, contact the gift card company (some can freeze unused balances)
- If they paid by wire transfer, contact the wire service within 24 hours
- Place a fraud alert on their credit reports (Equifax, Experian, TransUnion)
Report it
- FBI’s IC3: ic3.gov (Internet Crime Complaint Center)
- FTC: reportfraud.ftc.gov
- AARP Fraud Helpline: 877-908-3360
- Local Adult Protective Services: eldercare.acl.gov or call 211
- Local police: file a report for documentation
Get support
Being scammed is traumatic. Your parent may feel ashamed, angry, or afraid. The AARP Fraud Helpline (877-908-3360) offers free support from trained volunteers, many of whom are fraud survivors themselves.
Prevention Is Cheaper Than Recovery
The average elder fraud victim loses thousands of dollars. The emotional toll — the shame, the fear, the loss of confidence — can be even more devastating than the financial loss.
A few hours of prevention work (setting up call screening, having the conversation, establishing a code word, and putting a daily companion in place) can save your parent from an experience that changes their life for the worse.
You can’t protect them from everything. But you can make it harder for the scammers to get through.
HiFriendbot’s Senior Care plan includes Grace, an Ai companion with built-in scam protection for seniors. If your parent mentions someone asking for money or personal information, Grace flags it and encourages them to talk to family first. $29.99/month. Learn more at hifriendbot.com.